When I started my first job in radio I was told by one of my bosses I didn’t have a future in broadcasting.  Several years later, at my first interview for a BBC job (in Belfast in the early 1980’s), I was told at the job internview that “my knowledge of Northern Ireland was to say the least superficial and my knowledge of television – zero”.  They gave me the job anyway!

Belfast could not have given me betting grounding. I had already spent seven years, after University, working for local newspapers and independent radio news. But nothing compared with Northern Ireland. I had been in the job three days and was the rookie of the team when I was sent to cover the killing of a police officer. In those days the strict BBC guidelines we follow now didn’t exist. We were expected to knock at the doors of grieving families often within hours of a shooting or bombing, and that’s exactly what I did that day. 

Tensions were high in Northern Ireland then, there were bombs and killings almost every day.  A death threat had been issued by one of the paramilitary groups against BBC staff.  I can’t over-estimate the help and friendship of the editors and reporters I worked with then.

Later I travelled the world for Newsnight, Panorama and Foreign News, and had a three year spell with ITV’s “This Week”. I couldn’t believe how privileged I was to be able to see and be part of so many massively important  stories – the first Gulf war, for example and the Fall of the Berlin wall. 

When I married and had a son I settled back into a UK based job as Environment Correspondent (a fantastic job!) – then as one of the Home Affairs team. That brought me back full circle. There was a bomb attack in Ealing, the BBC was bombed and then came 9/11. Terrorism has dominated the brief ever since.

9/11 changed everything and part of my job was to document that – not just the obvious changes in security and the law – but also underlying social changes. 

For years I worked developing contacts in government, the police and the intelligences agencies. By July 7 2005 we were well prepared.  

This was the first big domestic story where the public played a major role in the coverage. The BBC was being emailed mobile phone footage and pictures within minutes of the attacks. Families searching for loved ones came to us – we did not have to look far for interviewees.

I’ve had a fantastic and privileged career with the BBC.  My decision to leave was based in part on the fact I wanted to go while I still have time to fulfil other ambitions. It’s also based the fact that whatever the BBC spin doctors might say, in my view the present culture means it’s difficult for women like myself who are over 50, to continue high profile reporting on screen. I took the decision to get out while I was ahead. It was also becoming increasingly difficult to do the job and be a mother. (I suspect some fathers with working partners find it hard too). I regularly went from one end of the week to the other seeing my child only when he was asleep in bed – because of the increasingly early morning starts, as well as late nights working for the Ten O’Clock news.

Having left I understand perhaps better than before, that the BBC brand is immensely powerful. The fact I’ve worked for the organisation for so many years is on the whole a help in the outside world and anyone else leaving who feels a bit daunted should remember this. I’m lucky enough to be working already on a range of projects – writing,   broadcasting and commercial work as an analyst and consultant. On top of that the independent think tank RUSI has made me an associate fellow specialising in Homeland Security so I still get to see many of my contacts.  And of course – I now get to see my son every day!